February Or Forever Read online

  ‘Thought so.’

  ‘Regular stretching should help that, and massage when needed.’ Chrissie wished she was also qualified in massage.

  Drew nodded. ‘Apart from that, I’m all good.’

  ‘Good.’ She nodded.

  ‘Good,’ he said.

  Chrissie turned away and lit the floating candle in the bowl atop the small table that sat between the two large windows. ‘Not that we need any extra light in here, but I always like to light a candle for my classes.’

  ‘I like candles,’ he said. ‘Electricity is overrated.’

  Her lips eased into a smile and she gestured towards the yoga mat in front of hers. ‘If you’d like to take your position, we’ll start with some breathing as you stand in Tadasana.’

  Drew stood straight, his feet shoulder width apart, hands by his side, relaxed but firmly in position. Even in trackpants and a t-shirt he looked good.

  ‘Now, make sure your weight is evenly distributed, and feel a sense of lifting up from your knees and thighs and hips, lengthening the spine.’ She walked around him, assessing his posture, and feeling slightly guilty that she was glad her role allowed her eyes free reign over his body. His shoulders were slightly hunched forwards and she brought her hands up to touch them, warmth from his body reaching her before she got to them. ‘Bring your shoulders back and downwards, but don’t tense them.’ She grasped his rounded deltoid muscles and encouraged them gently backwards, rolling his shoulders back and down. God, they were hard. His muscles tensed ever so slightly at first touch, then relaxed into the correct position. ‘That’s better,’ she said softly. ‘When you’re playing guitar your shoulders roll forward, so you need to counteract this regularly.’

  ‘Sure, I can do that.’

  Yep, perfect student. So, so perfect. She smiled as she stood behind him, a natural, masculine scent circling around her as she worked. ‘Make sure your core muscles are gently drawn inwards, and activate and tuck under your, um…’ she glanced down at his…

  ‘My arse?’

  ‘Um, yes.’ She cleared her throat.

  ‘Or my ass, as they say in the States,’ he put on his best American accent. ‘My previous teacher always used the term buttocks, but it’s too fancy schmancy, don’t you think?’

  Chrissie remained behind him with her hands on his shoulders, ensuring he wouldn’t let his upper body posture drop while concentrating on his lower body, and that he couldn’t see the red heat crawling over her face at his uninhibited honesty.

  ‘It does sound a bit…formal. I’ll be sure to use your preferred term from now on,’ she said, holding back a grin.

  She walked around to the front of him, and pointed to the circular painting on the wall above the floating candle, its symmetrical patterns and balanced colours having a calming effect. ‘Keep your focus on the mandala over there, and breathe slowly and deeply.’

  His chest rose and fell.

  ‘When you inhale, feel the air fill your lungs and expand your ribcage. The middle of your torso should move outwards, rather than just your upper chest or belly.’

  He adjusted his breath and his body followed. She breathed in and out along with him, then took position on her floor mat. She expertly took the Tadasana stance, slightly off centre of the mat so he could stay focused on the wall behind her. ‘Keep breathing in…and out.’ Chrissie could imagine the air between them being sucked into opposing lungs, each exhalation merging together in front of them in a curly, sinuous haze.

  After ten deep breaths Chrissie locked eyes with Drew. ‘Now, let’s get the blood flowing with Surya Namaskar, otherwise known as Sun Salutations. You’d be familiar with that?’ She raised her eyebrows.

  ‘Yes. Hopefully I can remember the order everything goes in. Can you show it to me first?’

  ‘Sure.’ Chrissie inhaled and stretched her arms above her head, focusing on her hands as she pointed them to the ceiling. Exhaling, she lowered her arms and bent at the waist, placing her hands on the floor either side of her feet. Even though she wasn’t fully warmed up yet, her body moved with the ease and flexibility of years of practice. Her body she could control, her personal life — not so much.

  She jumped her legs back into a plank position, the deep muscles in her core kicking into gear, and her body heated up at not only the movement, but the knowledge that Drew Williams was watching her. She pushed her hands against the floor and her torso upwards, a rewarding stretch elongating her stomach muscles, then opposed the movement by pushing her ‘arse’ in the air as she eased into downward dog. Each change of movement was accompanied by a change in breath — inhale, move, exhale, move. She jumped her feet forwards to meet her hands, straightened up to repeat her stretch to the ceiling, then lowered her arms into the pose of Tadasana.

  Clap, clap, clap. Drew was clapping? She’d never had a round of applause for yoga before. The sound woke her from her yogic focus, and warmth flushed her face. Hopefully he would think it was from the effort of saluting the sun.

  ‘Perfect,’ he said. ‘I wish I was as flexible as you.’

  ‘By the end of the month you’ll be a lot more flexible.’

  ‘I’m glad you’ll be here to keep me on track.’

  ‘I’ll do my best.’ She smiled. ‘So, let’s see what you’ve got,’ she challenged him.

  Drew took a deep breath and stretched upwards, then lowered his torso down. ‘I can really feel that at the back of the legs.’

  ‘Bend your knees if you need to at first.’

  He continued with the sun salutation, and Chrissie watched the position of each movement. When he pushed back into downward dog, his posture was a bit off.

  ‘Try to keep your heels on the floor, and don’t hunch your shoulders,’ she said, hoping she didn’t sound too picky. It was only his first lesson, but it was important to get the posture right from the get go, rather than force the body into a deep stretch that wasn’t correct. ‘Remember, shoulders down and back, so your spine can elongate.’

  She had to do it, she had to touch him. She’d do this with any other student, so she shouldn’t make an exception for fear of coming across as too keen. Chrissie placed her hand on the small of his lower back, her fingers coming into contact with skin as his t-shirt fell away a little. She pushed gently against it, encouraging proper alignment of the back.

  ‘Ah yes, I see what you mean,’ he said, his voice slightly thick from his head being upside down. His body eased further into the stretch and she released her hand, though a tingle of warmth remained on her fingertips. He stepped his feet towards his hands and rolled his body up to standing, stretching his hands to the ceiling. ‘Ooh,’ he said, after returning to Tadasana. ‘It has definitely been a while!’

  ‘It’ll get easier,’ Chrissie replied. ‘You’re off to a good start.’

  Drew’s gaze paused on hers, and they both released a small laugh. ‘A Good Start, eh?’ He smiled. ‘You know the song?’ He eyed her curiously.

  Every. Single. Word. Backwards even. ‘Yes, I do.’

  Drew appeared genuinely flattered. ‘It wasn’t even a number one hit, was really only on the album to fill it up. But it ended up being one of my favourites.’

  ‘Sometimes it’s the unexpected things that turn out to be the best.’ Like this. Today. Him.

  ‘Serendipity indeed.’

  Chrissie grinned. ‘You like a good pun, do you?’

  ‘Can’t pass up a perfectly appropriate pun opportunity,’ he replied. ‘Careful,’ he held up his hands, ‘they may sneak into conversation a little too often and you’ll probably end up rolling your eyes by the end of the month.’

  If she rolled her eyes, it would more likely be from utter bliss than irritation. ‘Oh, I doubt it.’ She held out her hands to mimic what he’d done earlier when he told her to ‘facilitate away’. ‘Go for it. Pun away!’ she joked.

  He laughed, a beautiful ripple of delight decorating his face. He pointed gently towards her. ‘Don’t say I didn’t warn you.�
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  Her earlier nerves had transformed into something else. What was it? She was more relaxed, yet still sort of wired to be in his presence. She felt more…awake. And it was a feeling she could certainly get used to.

  After guiding him through ten more sun salutations, the rest of the class was spent re-learning some of the basic yoga poses, and before Chrissie knew it their time was up. It had gone so fast, and although she desperately needed to go eat something and take a break, part of her didn’t want to leave the room.

  ‘Here,’ she said, handing Drew her business card. ‘This has my details on it should you have any questions during your stay. Helena said you’re welcome to change to an afternoon session if you prefer, or even have two a day.’

  ‘Thanks.’ He took the card and glanced at it, her smiling photo on the front. ‘Yes, I’ll see how I go. If every class is as enjoyable as this one, then that’s a tempting offer.’ He slipped the card into the pocket of his trackpants and grinned.

  Chrissie glanced at the floor as heat flushed her face. ‘Oh, shucks,’ she said with a chuckle. ‘You’re too kind.’

  ‘As are you.’ He held his hand towards her, taking her by surprise. ‘Thank you, Chrissie. I’ll see you tomorrow.’

  She shook his hand and he held it a moment longer than expected. ‘I’ll be here.’

  One day down, twenty-seven to go.

  Chapter 4

  Twenty-seven and a half days to go. Would that be enough? Enough to take some time off, yes, but enough to let the media scandal blow over? News and gossip moved fast, especially in L.A., but once a reputation was tarnished it could be hard to redeem.

  Drew left the dining room after the kitchen staff cleared the table of the lunch remains, and walked upstairs to the sleeping quarters, the month ahead on his mind. He grabbed his guitar and sat on the king-sized four-poster bed, resting the instrument on his lap, filling the mould his body created for it like a lock and a key. The strings vibrated as he ran his thumb across them, the perfect graduation of tones calming his mind. There was nothing more he could do right now — short of going on a talk show and telling his side of the story, but that wasn’t in his nature. Why should his personal life be public entertainment? His music, yes, his life, no. Unfortunately, the industry didn’t see it like that.

  He’d have to try and forget about it, let his legal and publicity people back home do their jobs, so he could be free to do his: work on some new songs.

  He reached across to the bedside table and grabbed the pen and piece of paper he’d scribbled notes on. With any luck, if he managed to create a new song before his tour next month, he could perform it to his fans as a bit of a bonus. A sneak peek at what might be on his next album. If he still had fans after all this.

  Tightness pinched at Drew’s chest and he tossed the paper to the floor in frustration. One minute he was okay and the next he wasn’t.

  Why couldn’t she have left things alone?

  Why did she have to mess things up for me?

  He should never have got involved with Jolene, should have seen that she was trouble the moment she got upset when he’d gone to a simple function without her. It was a quiet industry function with a few associates important to his career, not a wild party with all the high-flyers she loved rubbing shoulders with and paparazzi queued out front snapping pictures. He’d tried to make it up to her by planning a romantic dinner, but pretty soon nothing was ever good enough for her, and he couldn’t be with her every second of every day. When he’d broken it off, it had also broken off her connection to the limelight — something even worse in her books. So what did she do? She worked her way back into the spotlight and garnered sympathy by spreading false rumours about him and tainting his good guy image.

  Drew picked up his phone and his finger hovered over the internet browser, unsure whether to check the latest public comments about the scandal. He wanted to get on there and leave his own comment, tell everyone she was a liar, but he was advised not to indulge the hype. He tossed the phone onto the bed and clenched his fists, clamping his lips together. Letting go was difficult, but he had to try. Starting now.

  He closed his eyes, and an image of Chrissie flashed in his mind. She was pretty, and with her golden skin and natural blonde hair, she looked every bit the Aussie, beachy girl. Her soft, clear voice echoed inside his head… ‘Let the air fill your lungs and expand your ribcage’.

  Drew breathed in deeply, his chest expanding, then released the air through pursed lips. In…and…out. He opened his eyes and brought his attention to a painting on the wall, a calming scene of a beach at sunset with an effortless blending of colours. Kind of like the notes he liked to play — each one blending easily into the next, creating one perfect melody that was like a sunset to the ears.

  Chrissie had told him to focus on the mandala on the wall in the yoga room, so he decided to do the same here with the painting. With each breath, he imagined the waves rolling in on the shore, then washing back into the ocean with each exhalation. The ocean. He’d have to go for a walk on the beach later on. As long as he kept to the more secluded north end, he shouldn’t be spotted. He’d love to go for a surf sometime too. But if the waves were big the crowd might be big, and then so much for laying low. As for eating a takeaway lunch in Miracle Park and kicking a ball around like he’d done with his mates as a teenager, well, that was completely off the cards. If word got out he was here, the media might camp out at Serendipity. And even worse, Jolene might find out where he was.

  He shook his head, trying to shake away the constant interruptions to his peace.

  ‘Keep breathing in…and out’. Chrissie’s voice returned in his mind, and he allowed her gentle instruction to bring him back to the present. As the sunset painting blurred under his gaze, he yawned, his body telling him it was time to go to bed, even though it was only 2 p.m. in Australia. It would be best if he could stick it out and stay awake till at least nine, to adjust his body clock to the new time zone. He was no stranger to long hours and late nights, but now that he was getting older he couldn’t bounce back as well as he used to. His life was changing, and he had to change with it. And this was the time to make a start. A good start.

  He grinned as he remembered Chrissie’s words, and how they’d laughed at the fact that it was also one of his song titles. He was surprised she knew it. A Good Start didn’t get much air time on radio, so she must have listened to the album it was on. If she was a fan, she hadn’t made a fuss about it, and that impressed him. It was nice to meet someone who treated him like a normal guy. A lazy smile eased into Drew’s cheeks, and her image flashed in his mind again. Chrissie. Yoga would be his ‘constant’ for this month, as she’d advised. Something he could turn to to keep his mind from straying into unwanted territory. Which meant — Chrissie would be his constant too. He decided right then that whenever Jolene’s face intruded into his mind, he’d replace it with Chrissie’s. And by the end of the month, he hoped, he would barely even remember what Jolene looked like.

  Drew whooshed out a heavy breath and laid back on the bed, fatigue weakening his body, the image of Chrissie’s face the last thing he saw before sleep claimed him.

  Chapter 5

  ‘I’m exhausted.’ Kai practically fell through the front door after school and kicked off his shoes, leaving one in the hallway and one in the living room.

  ‘Kai, can you please put your shoes away in your room?’ No sooner had the words left Chrissie’s mouth than Kai had flopped on the couch, his face squished sideways into a cushion. Chrissie sighed. ‘Kai, shoes first, then you can rest.’

  ‘Oh, but Mum. You don’t understand. You don’t know what it’s like to be this tired.’ He strung out the last word with dramatic emphasis.

  ‘Oh for heaven’s sake.’ Chrissie bent and hooked the heel of one shoe on her finger, then the other, and flung them into her son’s room. At least they were out of the way; he could put them in the wardrobe himself later. Chrissie picked up Kai’s school
bag that he’d dumped next to the couch, and chuckled. Don’t know what it’s like to be this tired? She shook her head at her son’s naivety. Granted, he was only six, but if only he knew. Getting up five times a night on average for the first year of his life? That was the definition of tired.

  She plonked the bag on one of the dining table chairs whose seat cushion was tearing at the seams and exposing a chunk of foam, and zipped it open. She withdrew a drawing of what resembled a nasty looking angel and a few school notes; parent information night, curriculum summary and expected academic outcomes, and what do you know? A lice outbreak already and it was only the fourth day into the school year. Great, she’d have to get out the fine-tooth comb and magnifying glass and examine Kai’s head for the little critters. Why did school have to feel like a whole second job? Chrissie longed for the calmness of Serendipity, the peace inherently present within its walls, and the exhilarating buzz of being around…

  ‘Mum?’ Kai yelled.

  ‘Kai, I’m right here, no need to shout.’

  ‘Can you get me a drink?’

  ‘Magic word?’

  ‘Pleeaase.’ When she didn’t reply immediately, Kai added, ‘Pretty please, with sugar on top?’

  ‘Sugar’s not healthy.’

  ‘Well, um, with…yoga on top?’

  Chrissie tipped her head back with a laugh. Kai was well versed in the health benefits that yoga provided. Although, when he was in preschool, she’d had to clarify her profession to him after he’d told a classmate that his mum was a ‘yoghurt teacher’.

  ‘Well, that wasn’t exactly what I had in mind,’ she replied, an image of Drew on top flashed in her mind before she flicked it away, ‘but since you asked so nicely.’ She left the school bag and opened the fridge, pulling out a carton of milk and a tub of yoghurt, then grabbed a box of frozen berries from the freezer. ‘One smoothie coming up.’

  ‘Yum.’ Kai pressed the remote on the television and a wildly colourful cartoon blared from the screen.

  Glossy white milk seeped in between the clumps of berries as Chrissie poured it in the blender, followed by a couple of dollops of yoghurt. She held the cover closed as the blender whirred, whipping the ingredients up into a purpley-pink liquid.